Snippets: Shounen Oujo (Boy Princess) Chapter 4 (June 2011)

Boy Princess Chapter 4

**posts may do contain foul language and other stuff ~ FYI ;D

Chapter starts off with us getting a full frontal close up of the queen. Man, her pantyhose must be riding high for her to be looking that PO’d. Albert thinks the queen looks like that because she’s a cold hearted bitch with a fetish for uteruses.

Personally I think it’s the wedige, but who knows.

After all the bowing and formal rituals have been completed, first up to bat is that king from chapter 3 who could rival the Burger King mascot in terms of creepiness. He approaches the queen and proceeds to lick her boots. He waxes all sorts of brown-nosing poetry that actually pisses the queen off more (I know right, how could she look even  more bitchy? But she somehow achieves this). Before she can scream off with his balls, he calls forth his royal…singer(?) person, whom he brought so the singer’s voice could sooth the ails of the queen (gueez, I wonder who is further up her ass crack right now: her panties or this guy’s nose!?).

“Now, Olivie, come forth!”
“Olivie is one who holds a voice loved by the gods…and is like an elf wearing the guise of this world’s inhabitants.”

What!? Oh hell no he didn’t! – Gii is not pleased with king’s description. An elf, by Gii’s pedobear standards, is a girl who is just on the cusp of puberty.

(ಠ_ಠ) and there went this manga’s chances of being licensed.

Thankfully before this series can get loli weird, Albert cock blocks Gii’s pedo train (use your imagination to think how that sentence works). The two settle their differences by stepping on one another’s feet xD As this is going on in the background, the queen tells the king, fine, go let your little bitch sing for me. Olivie starts to sing and everyone gets an orgasm, because that’s how awesome Olivie’s singing is (oh gawd, that awkward panel with the king in it. Please may he not be jacking off :<).

Already done with their orgasm, Gii and Albert talk about Olivie. Albert is questioning how can Olivie have such a high pitch even though he’s a boy.

And then I go, what!? THAT’S A DUDE!?

Gii calmly tells Albert that Olivie underwent castration when he was younger so as to keep his high pitch.  I’m surprised that as a member of the penis carrying gender, Gii could have been just a SMIDGE more emotional about the topic of castration but hey, apparently if he still has his junk, fuck anyone else’s penis.

Since SATs weren’t a requirement back in the day, Albert has no idea what castration is. Gii gives a long winded explanation to which Albert shortens into this sentence which he screams out for all to hear:

“HE AIN’T GOT NO BALLS!?”

While this would be funny to hear randomly while walking with friends, Albert is currently dressed up as the princess in a room filled with stuffy nobles. Screaming about man wangs isn’t something a princess does. EVERYONE in the room is staring at Albert like he pulled his pants down and let loose a turd in the punch bowl. Gii saves the day by saying the “princess” is tired and is going to retire early. He proceeds to drag Albert out of the room.

While walking back, Gii throws a hissy fit. He scolds Albert for freaking out about the word castration (he’s MALE dude! Of course he’d freak. A guy’s penis is his EVERYTHING!) and babbling the word “man wang” for all to hear. He then threatens Albert:

“If you can’t truly act like the princess’s double, maybe we need to castrate you for better results?”

Ohohoho, you don’t threaten a man with penis chopping, Gii. Albert freaks. He gets penis danger adrenaline which gives him strength to round house kick Gii in the face (impressive, seeing how the young lad is in a dress). This action causes Gii’s glasses to go falling and like every bespeckled character, he falls to the floor to search out his missing glasses.  Albert runs for it (penis in hand xD).

His penis out of danger, Albert reflects on the party. He recalls how hostile and nasty the air was. No wonder the princess is a little messed up in the head…

Up ahead he sees Olivie…faceplant xD Rushing over, Albert asks if Olivie is okay, extending a hand to pull him up. Olivie’s spider senses tingle and he pushes Albert out of the way. In Albert’s old spot, an arrow is embedded in the ground. Oh look, it’s the sister. Of course. You always bring your BOW AND ARROW with you to a party :/

Somehow, Olivie ends up on top of Albert. Rather than think, oh gawd this is ghey, Albert – like all males – has his mind focused on one thing: THIS GUY HAS NO PENIS!

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NO PENIS

NOT THERE!

As a dude, Olivie can sort of mind read Albert’s thoughts because hey, it’s about penises. He’s like, you’re freaked out about the fact I have no penis and Albert is all OMG HOW DID YOU KNOW!? I MEAN NO OF COURSE NOT HAHAHAHAHAHAHA….CAN’T LOOK YOU IN THE EYE. Olive tells Albert that he’s sweet for trying to hide his freak out about Olivie’s circumstances

NO PENIS

Olivie walks Albert to his room. Just as he’s about to walk away, Olivie trips again (no panty shot). Albert decides to remedy the problem  – they just need to shorten Olivie’s skirt. And because it’s Japan, when they say shorten, they mean shorten. So now Olivie – THE MAN – is sporting a mini skirt (see, good thing you don’t have those boulders swinging down there, huh!). Of course Albert laughs, because hey, it’s a guy in a mini skirt. What ISN’T funny about that?

The two bond because of the mini-skirt (so I do expect we will see more of Olivie in the future).

Albert goes into the room where he and the princess are supposed to meet but he is surprised to see she isn’t there. About to watch some Jersey Shore to kill time until the princess comes back, a horse’s neigh catches his attention. Some horse is going bat shit crazy outside. While looking at the horse, since Albert is high up, he notices something moving in the corner of his eye. It’s his coat!

WHAT!? NO PENIS I MEAN HAUNTED COAT!?

No, it’s the princess! She’s dressed as Albert! And she’s ducking out of a door that exits the castle!

WHAT!?

End

Oh shit guys, what’s going on? Why’s the princess running for it!?

3 thoughts on “Snippets: Shounen Oujo (Boy Princess) Chapter 4 (June 2011)

  1. Pingback: June 2011 Sylph « Spoils

    • ?
      Sorry but my RL comes before my OL :3

      If you’re in a hurry, you can always purchase the manga (# 1 was just released in Japan this month) or subscribe to Comic Sylph’s monthly magazine~
      Otherwise… ┐(‘~`;)┌ *shrugs*

      Be patient is all I can say ~

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